I don’t think there’s such a thing as moving on.
At least, not really.
As I was making a mug of cold chocolate today, I got lost in thought. I was so distracted I nearly destroyed the mug stirring it viciously with a fork.
I had realized something.
You never fully get over someone. Not if you were really in love with them.
I still write about my exes. And, I find, I still love them. Still do.
I used to be so proud to be able to be friends with my exes. Most people cast away their ex-lovers and treat them as strangers. I never understood that. Until now.
It’s easy to say “I’ve 100% moved on!” when you’re happy and moving on with someone else. But when you’re alone, it stirs up trouble.
In your heart somewhere, it’s still rooted that you have feelings for this person. These people. They still, SOMEHOW, have a hold on you.
No matter how big or small that influence may be.
As Uma Thurman once said - "I still love the people I’ve loved, even if I cross the street to avoid them."
And she’s right. Everyone’s been right all along.
I was too blind and proud to admit it.
Cross the street and avoid them. Delete their number and Facebook. Break up all possibility of contact. Out of sight, out of mind.
Because one word, and I swear to you they will string you along, drag you through the mud. Especially when you’re caught off guard at a lonely time in your life, and they make you believe this time they’ve changed. Your months and years of progress will disintegrate as easily as poking a pile of cigarette ash.
Every aching struggle you’ve done to get where you are now will have gone to waste. And then you’ll have to start, all over again.
Don’t let her wreck your progress.
Don’t let her ruin you."